Deconstructing Lyrical Mythologies: Kiss, by Prince

Prince was and continues to be sonic sex. Confidence, bottomless talent, attitude, bad-boy charisma balanced with a charming poise that almost teeters on humility.

…almost. Dat side-eyed smirk…. (ugh).

He teased gender norms to a place where this straight-as-an-arrow lady would have gone down on him even if he had the same bits. (Kudos to all you that do, cunnilingus-lovers. You are gems, all of you. GEMS!)

STILL! I don’t know how to digest his directorial disposition in this song… I get there’s a bit of BDSM in there, so the dom-sub dynamic is evident and understood. I KIND of find it sexy, but I also KIND of find it imposing and, quite frankly.. a bit presumptuous.

I think I’m picking up on this because he seems to be addressing a potential lover as opposed to initiating some sexytime in an already established relationship. It feels as if he is making assumptions about her sexuality that maybe she hasn’t expressed yet? Or, maybe she’s totally into it because she’s a virgin, completely inexperienced and/or passive THAT’s what HE’s into. In which case, gross….

As much as I wiggle my booty to and push up the fade on this tune whenever I hear it, there is always that residual feeling of…..dissatisfaction? Something being left unsaid or undone? Eh……

Let’s break it down

Uh! HOTTTTT. Just LISTEN to the way he sings this one. word.

You don’t have to be beautiful WHAT!? But….. I need to FEEL beautiful to fuck YOU.


To turn me on You’d still fuck me? Ain’t that JUST like a dude?


I just need your body baby
From dusk till dawn Just a body? Cool, I’ve got one in the basement. It’s still technically MINE because it’s in MY basement.


You don’t need experience
To turn me out Wait…..Who’s turning WHO out, in this scenario?


You just leave it all up to me
I’m gonna show you what it’s all about The LAST time (Ok ALL times) I just “left it all up to” a man, I did NOT have an orgasm. Just sayin’

You don’t have to be rich
To be my girl Sweet, because
78% to 82% of your salary. So, glad you’re savvy!


You don’t have to be cool
To rule my world GREAT, I’ve NEVER been cool, so this works for me. Plus, I hear derpy is the new Kate Moss.


Ain’t no particular sign I’m more compatible with
I just want your extra time and your

[Muah muah muah muah muah]

Kiss Quality time and physical touch are my top two love languages! According to Hinge, we may have a match!

You got to not talk dirty, baby
If you wanna impress me But…… I LIKE talking dirty. It turns ME on.


You can’t be too flirty, mama Sooo, I’ll just sit here….


I know how to undress me (Yeah) But I WAAANNNA 🙁


I want to be your fantasy Great! just let me do all the things you told me not to and that’s a total possibility


Maybe you could be mine Playing dead is NOT my hottest role-play fantasy.


You just leave it all up to me
We could have a good time Again with the…. no orgasm…thing..

You don’t have to be rich
To be my girl Gender pay-gap, bitches!!!


You don’t have to be cool
To rule my world I’m starting to get the impression that I’M not the subject of this encounter (Should I just leave a mirror here and go get a sammich?)


Ain’t no particular sign I’m more compatible with
I just want your extra time and your

[Muah muah muah muah]

Kiss Uhm…..K.

Yes
I think I wanna dance
Gotta, Gotta
Little girl Wendy’s parade :-/
Gotta, gotta, gotta

Women not girls rule my world
I said they rule my world But “women” know what they want and how to voice it.


Act your age, mama (Not your shoe size)
Not your shoe size Clever. And DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO


Maybe we could do the twirl wh…what the fuck is the Twirl?


You don’t have to watch Dynasty
To have an attitude Bitch, I’ve HAD this attitude since 1980.


You just leave it all up to me
My love will be your food
Yeah So, about that sammich?

You don’t have to be rich
To be my girl
You don’t have to be cool
To rule my world
Ain’t no particular sign I’m more compatible with
I just want your extra time and your

Kiss *SMOOCH*

To all of my fellow Prince lovers, I’m open to any and all rotten eggs, veggies, pish-poshes, and spankings. I just thought I’d air this one out a bit.

Too soon?

Have a song you’d like me to de-mythstify? Let me know in the comments below!




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